grief-changes-usAll of a sudden, I felt I maybe ready to face my grieve after seven years of stonewalling and a front of evasive strength.  See, I have built me, out of grieve,  a huge wall which behind it stood a horror beyond my comprehension.  Every time I feel that somewhere this monster is breaking a brick at this wall, I take a peak only to be appall by dark waves of sadness more than I can bear, so I quickly close that burning hole and put back that brick.

But grieve, like Gog and Magog, persistently hammer through the wall and eventually will break it to crumble- only to sweep me someday with an overwhelming emotions.

You know what… I think I am not ready yet.  Since I am still going around and round the subject instead of facing it head on.

Maybe another time.  For now… I will let the wall stand.

©Gainperspective3/8/2016

Advertisements

7 thoughts on “The Wall of Gog & Magog & Grief!©

  1. For me, the wall is not stopping you from grieving but it is your grief. It is your wall, with your texture, your colour, your anger, the hardness that lets you know of your softness. Grieving is hard and stony and with the wall as your friend, sadness is an achievement that will wait for you to be ready. I’m new to looking at your blog so forgive me if I’m speaking out of turn. So often, grieving people don’t love the wall inside them……

    Liked by 1 person

    1. How wonderful to reach out and share with me your thoughts..thank you so much. We build some kind of a wall between us and our raw emotions, the one we cannot face or process. We think we are fine until the moment when we hit this wall of resistance within…and realize its existence. That moment our perspective changes and we see things differently. We choose then to deal with it or continue ignoring it until further notice. I wrote of such moment.
      Thank you so much again and keep up writing your comments. I would love to hear from you.

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s